Your weakness is in the most important aspect of your
relationship.
If you are strong at "thinking together," ask
yourself: "What goes wrong (mentally, and "between us")
in the precise moment when I am wanting sex?," and, "What
goes wrong (mentally, and "between us") in the precise moment
when my partner is wanting sex?" Read the last section of this
analysis on "The Best Way To Communicate For Problem-Solving"
for some valuable hints to help you in this process.
If you are not particularly strong at "thinking
together" I strongly suggest that you get professional help.
A sex therapist is one possibility, but a therapist of one kind or another
- for you as a couple or for each of you individually - would be a good
idea.
(If it seems like I'm coming on too strong, remember
that you are both "fighting biology" here! This puts a tremendous
strain on each of you, and on your relationship.)
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